A new year and everything else that follows

It's been a crazy start for the new year. Feels like my head is still rushing to catch up with my body. After all the holiday bru-ha-has, much has to be said about what my life is going through right now. Changes. It's something you will never get used to no matter how many times you have done it.

This year marks my 30th (ya, you heard it right...the big 3-0) celebration of my being brought into this world, and as I look back at the things that have brought me to this point in my life, I can't help but wonder that if there really was a God...does He have a sense of humor?

Recently I have been enamored by a young lady, I suppose that it's normal for a man to be so. But what sets it apart is the fact that I know what I'm doing, I'm just not sure where it's going...yet. I suppose that alot of people were in my situation at one point or another, but I just can't help thinking about all the things that have happened to me which has lead me to this point in my life...confused and falling in love (which are probably one and the same).

So I do what comes naturally in this state, I panic. I tell myself that it's all an elaborate trap, that someone will pull the carpet out from under me and I would fall down with no safety net to catch me. It's not too late to run back. There's still time to back out. There's still a chance I might not plunge into the abyss known as crash-and-burn. So what do I do? I lunge in head first. I never was one to listen to words of caution, especially my own.

If experience has taught me anything, it's this - you can never have enough experience when it comes to matters of the heart. It's just something you do or you don't, there is no middle ground for it (or if there was, somebody conveniently left it out in the birthing process).

Nobody really knows what will happen next, I know I have absolutely no idea about it. But sometimes you don't really need to know or try and anticipate every move. Sometimes there is no right or wrong, there's just you and what you decide on. It's a leap of faith. Faith that is based on nothing but what you're feeling. Faith that has no credibility whatsoever but what your gut is trying to tell you. Faith in that there is no mistake about it even if you think it is.

Maybe I'm just getting old and sentimental. I know for sure that I'm being a wuss about it. But I guess we all go through that at some point in our lives...falling in love I mean.

It's a feeling that has no warning,
this thing called love
It's chocolates and flowers blooming,
this thing called love
It's hope and happiness and all things nice,
this thing called love
It's heartaches and pain and alot of spice,
this thing called love
It's what adults have forgotten but children understand,
this thing called love
It is innocence and pureness, humble not grand
this thing called love
It is you and me sharing a sunset
watching the world go by
listening to the sound of the wind pass us by
this thing called love